What have I done?! What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm suffocating. It wasn't until recently that I felt so behind in my studies. I was so motivated and now I'm trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with me. Everything is piling up while I needlessly ponder. My self-esteem just broke. I feel like such a fucking moron. I need to get back on track, but how? The walls are closing in on me and I'm drowning. My circadian cycle is so fucked up now and it's not helping me improve my grades at all. I don't know why I can't get myself to live through another school day. It's only 2 days a week for God's sake. What's wrong with me? I want to sever myself from my people, especially my social life. I don't want people to call me. I don't want to go anywhere right now. I want to be left alone. I want to feel good about myself again. I want more time for myself, and only myself. I want to get everything done. It's no one's fault other than my own. What can you do to help? Nothing really. All I ask for is an encouraging word, a prayer, or just leaving me alone. I can't do anything but drown in my own self pity. I'll just kick myself in the ass and see what happens from there...ugh. I'm supposed to be a leader...but I feel so lost.