I got the birthday I wanted, despite a few snafus here and there. I didn't want to get wasted, nor did I want to party hard. Well, at least not yet anyway. Boyfriend and I had your standard dinner and movie. It was nice being able to spend outside quality time with him. I haven't been able to do that lately. I'm not too sure what was in the air that night but I wasn't happy for a while. He was my hero. He saved my 21st birthday. I guess I'll get into detail later...maybe. All you need to know is that he made my birthday special even when I thought things weren't going right. Thanks beb. =) At the end of the night, we talked the night away without even realizing how late/early it was. It's okay...we all have the right to do whatever we want for our birthday. I did...not caring about the consequences that were about to follow. I guess I didn't get the peace of mind I needed, but for a brief moment, my life was perfect. Boyfriend told me that the only person who can give me peace of mind, is myself. I need to fight one battle at a time and take each day with a step...rather than a leap to fight my demons. I guess I can find myself in some serious shit, but for some reason I manage to find my way out of it and become a better person than I was before. Today is the first day I grow up a little more...wish me luck.

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Today started off kind of odd. I woke up early enough to get to school in plenty of time, but not early enough to review my notes for my POLS midterm. I had a hard time merging into the freeway I needed to get to. I ended up having to get lost a little bit and I decided to just head home since I forgot my scantrons and steel rule.

meh...let's see where the day takes me. I have a lot to do...but like my boyfriend said. Take it one step at a time. I'll be okay.

Pray for me. That's what I need. Life's slowly coming back to me.

"Leavin old shit behind...The blindfold's off my eyes, and today will be the start of better days."