If you can't reciprocate, we can't synergize. And If we can't synergize, there's no real sense of us. So, why are YOU in MY life? Talk may be cheap, but it has more value than indifference. If it means anything to you, say something. Do something. You're in my life for a reason and if you don't know it... figure it out. God knows I'm tryin' here.
Keep me close because I keep you closer.
Saturday, January 01, 2011
7300
I have landed in my birthplace - Manila, Philippines.
To some, I'd still be just as far away from them if I were huddled up in my room in Eagle Rock. Sadly the distance would do their burning indifference no justice. Others, I would hope to think that they miss me because I've crossed the international date line. Honestly, it makes no difference to me right now. As dickheaded as that seems, I need this trip to be about me and my self-exploration. (For the record, YES I miss quite a few people back in Cali. (You know who you are, but if you don't, assume I miss you since you cared enough to read this post.)
I've slipped in and out of sleep, ass posted in seat F of the 69th row. I'd peek out the window across from me wondering where I was, while Perry quietly nested on my lap. Two movies, two graphic books, two meals, and one red wine later, I've managed to land in Manila; the city I was born in and never really got to experience. Twenty-seven years later, I arrive without a single clue as to what to expect.
The baggage claim welcomed us with twinkling parols at every carousel and Christmas music floated about the terminal. The sudden warmth of the humidity seeped into my skin. The wick of excitement has been lit, but I haven't really exploded in elation upon stepping onto Philippine soil. It wasn't until three full cars came to greet us at bay 13. For some, tears of joy flowed during this overdue reunion. Not me, though. I was still trying to remember faces and names that I've only seen through pictures and stories from lola. It was overwhelming. It was overwhelming because I've never had someone who's never met me get so excited about me standing in front of them. I immediately felt at home... 7300 miles away.
My elders would always gush about how crazy New Years was on the islands. Now, upon experiencing it for myself, they were severely underplaying it. This was the first time I've bursted with happiness at the stroke of midnight. When in the Philippines, do as the locals do, right? We lit up our fireworks, sounded our turotots and ate & drank like royals.
I have NEVER sensed this kind of energy anywhere at any time in life.
I have NEVER dropped my jaw in complete, speechless amazement of what I saw, heard & felt until I was out on the streets of Quezon City.
I have NEVER felt more alive.
I have NEVER been this confident about a new year starting.
No countdown. No ball drop. No champagne. No need.
Happy 2011, Mark. You got what you wanted; a renewed sense of self.
Shit. It's only been the second day. You have a lot more living to do out here on the islands. Who knows how far your point of view will change.
It's 2011. Time to reap what I have sown and enjoy the bounty of opportunity. My blood's still young. It's so young, it runs and won't stop until it's over. I won't stop to surrender.
I'm starting to develop my sense of self here, and I'll get to THAT later.
[To be continued]
I have landed in my birthplace - Manila, Philippines.
To some, I'd still be just as far away from them if I were huddled up in my room in Eagle Rock. Sadly the distance would do their burning indifference no justice. Others, I would hope to think that they miss me because I've crossed the international date line. Honestly, it makes no difference to me right now. As dickheaded as that seems, I need this trip to be about me and my self-exploration. (For the record, YES I miss quite a few people back in Cali. (You know who you are, but if you don't, assume I miss you since you cared enough to read this post.)
I've slipped in and out of sleep, ass posted in seat F of the 69th row. I'd peek out the window across from me wondering where I was, while Perry quietly nested on my lap. Two movies, two graphic books, two meals, and one red wine later, I've managed to land in Manila; the city I was born in and never really got to experience. Twenty-seven years later, I arrive without a single clue as to what to expect.
The baggage claim welcomed us with twinkling parols at every carousel and Christmas music floated about the terminal. The sudden warmth of the humidity seeped into my skin. The wick of excitement has been lit, but I haven't really exploded in elation upon stepping onto Philippine soil. It wasn't until three full cars came to greet us at bay 13. For some, tears of joy flowed during this overdue reunion. Not me, though. I was still trying to remember faces and names that I've only seen through pictures and stories from lola. It was overwhelming. It was overwhelming because I've never had someone who's never met me get so excited about me standing in front of them. I immediately felt at home... 7300 miles away.
My elders would always gush about how crazy New Years was on the islands. Now, upon experiencing it for myself, they were severely underplaying it. This was the first time I've bursted with happiness at the stroke of midnight. When in the Philippines, do as the locals do, right? We lit up our fireworks, sounded our turotots and ate & drank like royals.
I have NEVER sensed this kind of energy anywhere at any time in life.
I have NEVER dropped my jaw in complete, speechless amazement of what I saw, heard & felt until I was out on the streets of Quezon City.
I have NEVER felt more alive.
I have NEVER been this confident about a new year starting.
No countdown. No ball drop. No champagne. No need.
Happy 2011, Mark. You got what you wanted; a renewed sense of self.
Shit. It's only been the second day. You have a lot more living to do out here on the islands. Who knows how far your point of view will change.
It's 2011. Time to reap what I have sown and enjoy the bounty of opportunity. My blood's still young. It's so young, it runs and won't stop until it's over. I won't stop to surrender.
I'm starting to develop my sense of self here, and I'll get to THAT later.
[To be continued]
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