Cross My Heart - Inspired by UP
Love makes us do crazy things. It inspires us to not only chase our own dreams but to fulfill the dreams of others. Though colors fade, seasons change, and dust collects, dreams always manage to resiliently remain in our hearts. Others tell me that my dreams are impossible, but there are so many people we run into, lessons we learn, and feelings we experience that tell me otherwise. Following the heart isn't necessarily easy. But, I admit, it certainly makes me feel alive; like I have a purpose in life.
My dreams are simply unachieved goals. When I set my sights on something or someone, I exert my all to get it. Unfortunately, that could also be my undoing. However, I'm the one who decides to take action, even if I am deemed unrealistic, insane or irrational. Many say that I could just be wasting my time, but to me, if I think it's worthwhile reason to fly, it's NEVER a waste of my time. Like I said before, "...my heart is telling me to fly freely. If I crash and burn, then the thrill of flight was worth the demise."
My dreams are as crazy as that floating house, but they are MY dreams. I want to climb to the summit, but I don't want to do it alone. Once I'm up there, I gotta be able to crave more out of life... but for now, it's time to carry my dreams.
To those who have a quiet dream, don't leave it on the shelf. Look in your adventure book and remind yourself that it's YOU that needs to live this life. If there's something in life you want, get it. Life is too short to wallow in the what-if's.
If you see me in my floating house, I can care less if you think I'm crazy. I want to fly UP and over the mundane. If you see the ground, then it means there's nowhere else but up.
UP. UP and away I go...
Come fly with me.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Summer feels like it has officially started now that my sister has finished high school.
How does it feel like summer, though?
It's not the heat that lets me know that it's summer. It's not the annoying teenybops flooding public areas taking up space and lengthening lines. It's certainly not just the bright blue skies and the family plans for trips and random outings.
It's the sudden changes (and the expectations of...) happening within myself and the people around me. I knew that this year would be about change, but we all know that summer seems to be a catalyst for newness. I kind of miss late night conversations and just playing video games. I miss staying up till the early hours just to do nothing the next afternoon when I finally decided to start a new day. However, things change. People change. Friendships, relationships & family ties are adjusted. From my experience, all the current connections either amplify or disintegrate during summer. It's almost like the heat melts away inhibitions.
Let's see how my life pans out before my birthday...
Kinda scared of what could come my way...
How does it feel like summer, though?
It's not the heat that lets me know that it's summer. It's not the annoying teenybops flooding public areas taking up space and lengthening lines. It's certainly not just the bright blue skies and the family plans for trips and random outings.
It's the sudden changes (and the expectations of...) happening within myself and the people around me. I knew that this year would be about change, but we all know that summer seems to be a catalyst for newness. I kind of miss late night conversations and just playing video games. I miss staying up till the early hours just to do nothing the next afternoon when I finally decided to start a new day. However, things change. People change. Friendships, relationships & family ties are adjusted. From my experience, all the current connections either amplify or disintegrate during summer. It's almost like the heat melts away inhibitions.
Let's see how my life pans out before my birthday...
Kinda scared of what could come my way...
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Transition
With each passing day, I find myself to be a stronger person. However, my heart gets so weak from time to time. I feel like I've forgotten how to stand on my own - be my own man. For most of my life I've always fought to maintain my own identity. When I was a kid, I struggled to be an individual. Needless to say, a twin is considered half of a whole...but even twins need to be two, distinct, WHOLE people. Now that I'm single again, I feel broken and conflicted. I don't know the Mark I thought I was supposed to be yet. However, I have managed to find ways to heal through amazing friends, tight family bonds, and a sense of adventure with a touch of insanity. Yeah, I'm a total fucking basketcase. But these days, I consider myself a man...and no longer a boy. I am really proud of that.
My heart hasn't been able to let go of everything. Though my own personal insanity has been keeping me on my toes, my heart knows what it wants. My brain is already 1,468,690,284,756 kinds of broken, but my heart is telling me to fly freely. If I crash and burn, then the thrill of flight was worth the demise.
If you have the ability to make me smile while I'm surrounded by my demons, I truly love you. If you have been motivated by anything I have done for myself, then I am alive with you. If you have done little things for me, then the bigger picture has become more colorful. I am grateful for everyone who has been there for me in all sorts of ways.
Transforming to a better me...and I hope you're still around when I'm done. This may take a while...but I just might need your help.
With each passing day, I find myself to be a stronger person. However, my heart gets so weak from time to time. I feel like I've forgotten how to stand on my own - be my own man. For most of my life I've always fought to maintain my own identity. When I was a kid, I struggled to be an individual. Needless to say, a twin is considered half of a whole...but even twins need to be two, distinct, WHOLE people. Now that I'm single again, I feel broken and conflicted. I don't know the Mark I thought I was supposed to be yet. However, I have managed to find ways to heal through amazing friends, tight family bonds, and a sense of adventure with a touch of insanity. Yeah, I'm a total fucking basketcase. But these days, I consider myself a man...and no longer a boy. I am really proud of that.
My heart hasn't been able to let go of everything. Though my own personal insanity has been keeping me on my toes, my heart knows what it wants. My brain is already 1,468,690,284,756 kinds of broken, but my heart is telling me to fly freely. If I crash and burn, then the thrill of flight was worth the demise.
If you have the ability to make me smile while I'm surrounded by my demons, I truly love you. If you have been motivated by anything I have done for myself, then I am alive with you. If you have done little things for me, then the bigger picture has become more colorful. I am grateful for everyone who has been there for me in all sorts of ways.
Transforming to a better me...and I hope you're still around when I'm done. This may take a while...but I just might need your help.
"There's so much craziness, surrounding me
There's so much going on, it gets hard to breathe
When all my faith has gone, you bring it back to me
You make it real for me
When I'm not sure of, my priorities
When I've lost sight of, where I'm meant to be
Like holy water, washing over me
You make it real for me
And I'm running to you baby
You are the only one who saved me
That's why I've been missing you lately
Cause you make it real for me..."
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